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Some Brothers Do Have 'Em
By Uche Nworah
Yes they do have ‘em, I mean all the luck if you are
wondering at my drift. And we mortals? We are ‘stuck’
with just one. Now I don’t want to begrudge a fellow
African brother his good fortune, sure he deserves his
lucky break. Neither am I contemplating changing my
nationality over a trivial matter like this. Sorry to
disappoint you Alex but if you are reading this, tough
luck; I’m not going to change my mind.
Oho, Alex Kamotho is my Kenyan colleague that I banter
with on African matters. He keeps telling me that there
are similarities between life in Nigeria and life in
Kenya. I have believed him until this
email from him popped up on my work email. Now I
know why those Kenyan brothers live longer, they love
life and seem to have perfected the art of modern
polygamy. Now don’t go sulking over your own ‘sorry’
condition, you deserve who you have right now, or don’t
you think so? It cannot be that bad after all, remember
that appearances deceive or don’t you think that those
smiles from the Mathus may be hiding other things?
Perhaps the ‘happy couple’ (don’t know if this phrase is
right, how do you describe a husband and his two wives,
would they still be addressed as couple, trio or what?)
may have just been smiling or posing for the cameras. I
am no social scientist to pass an accurate judgment on
this but Grandpa Nworah’s story may shed some light
here.
Should Grandpa Nze Nworah Okeke have been alive today,
perhaps he would have been saying to me, “You see, I
told you so; you don’t know what you’re missing.” I
suspect also that he may be saying to me, “What did you
learn from me? I’m really disappointed that none of you
are following my footsteps; you say you want to live
long. Didn’t I live long or don’t you know that by being
kept busy every other night, I had my mind off other
things which cause high blood pressure for your
generation? ” The old boy had two of them, and just as
he was getting nearer to his transition he added a
third, a much younger one at that. “My old age wife” he
called her. I could still recall the several morsels
that they all laid out on his dinner table every other
night back in the day, most of which were consumed by us
(the grand kids) during our nightly storytelling
sessions.
The old boy was spoilt for choice and sure did have lots
of tales to tell. A jolly good fellow he was too, strong
and agile till the last day. He did live to become one
of the oldest, if not the oldest in Enugwu-Ukwu before
his Chi called him. We placed his age at about 120 years
at the time of his passing on. Don’t ask me how we knew.
Ask the Nze na Ozors in Enugwu-Ukwu.
In those last days when his eyes became dim, he wasn’t
one to give up old habits; he still managed to keep his
harem in order. Catch him at his best mood after
overdosing on his Nkwu enu and watch him bark out
orders, God bless his soul. Perhaps by living up to such
an ‘Abrahamic’ age, he may have disproved the ‘no woman,
no cry myth’. How he managed it all is still a mystery;
perhaps the women in his days were more submissive or
perhaps not, go figure. But since him, no one else in
the family has attempted the double-portion act, except
my father’s younger half-brother, who I may describe as
a ‘true son’ of his father. He is at number two at the
moment and still counting.
I don’t know how a modern-day Nigerian brother could
pull off such a stunt and still come back home to a
well-deserved rest and nightly dose of you-know-what.
Not with some of the fiery characters brothers contend
with these days, one of whom is Tina (not her real name)
who has finally succeeded in sending our friend (Emeka)
to his grave so early in life. Emeka is thirty-something
and committed suicide in Enugu a few years back. He
couldn’t take all Tina’s heat and wahala anymore. God
Bless his poor soul.
The only other time that I have encountered the
double–portion story close-up was in my neighbour Chief
Ikoro back in Nigeria. But then his was a bit different.
He had no other choice but to marry Nkiru, his wife’s
younger sister who was on a visit to help out around the
house with the kids etc, and decided along the way to
share in some of her sister’s (Ngozi) joy. Chief Ikoro
would come back during lunch when his wife would have
already gone to her shop, and would be served lunch and
love from Nkiru. When Nkiru got pregnant, her family
called a meeting and after exploring several options
settled on marriage, none of the parties wanted
abortion. Nkiru became Chief Ikoro’s wife number two and
the family lived ‘happily’ ever after.
Now back to the main gist, what do you make of this
modern-day practice of polygamy? Could any right
thinking Nigerian brother in the life of him get away
with a stunt like this? Won’t our dear sisters string
such a brother on a pole at Wuse market? Esther and
Joyce Mathu, the two beautiful thirty-something year
olds caught in this love triangle story with their man,
the main object of their desire (Alfred
Mathu) claim that they are enjoying it. I hope they
are.
I bet our Nigerian sisters would have pushed such a
brother to the wolves were they in the ladies’ shoes.
Time to bring back good old traditional African
practices then? The story of the Mathus reproduced
here is just one of those modern tales that show
that in life, concerning ‘luck and fortune’, some
brothers do have ‘em, or maybe not.
posted 6 March 2007
Uche Nworah is freelance writer, lecturer and brand
strategist. He studied communications arts at the
University of Uyo, Nigeria and graduated with a second
class honours degree (upper division). He also holds an
M.Sc degree in marketing from the University of Nigeria,
Enugu campus and obtained his PGCE (post-graduate
certificate in education) from the University of
Greenwich where he is currently enrolled as a doctoral
candidate. His articles have been published by several
websites and leading Nigerian newspapers. He received
the ChickenBones Journalist of the Year award in 2006.
Uche can be contacted through
www.uchenworah.com and
info@uchenworah.com.
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Sex at the Margins
Migration, Labour Markets and the Rescue Industry
By Laura María Agustín
This book explodes several myths: that selling sex is completely different from any other kind of work, that migrants who sell sex are passive victims and that the multitude of people out to save them are without self-interest. Laura Agustín makes a passionate case against these stereotypes, arguing that the label 'trafficked' does not accurately describe migrants' lives and that the 'rescue industry' serves to disempower them. Based on extensive research amongst both migrants who sell sex and social helpers, Sex at the Margins provides a radically different analysis. Frequently, says Agustin, migrants make rational choices to travel and work in the sex industry, and although they are treated like a marginalised group they form part of the dynamic global economy. Both powerful and controversial, this book is essential reading for all those who want to understand the increasingly important relationship between sex markets, migration and the desire for social justice. "Sex at the Margins rips apart distinctions between migrants, service work and sexual labour and reveals the utter complexity of the contemporary sex industry. This book is set to be a trailblazer in the study of sexuality."—Lisa Adkins, University of London |
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Sister Citizen: Shame, Stereotypes, and Black Women in
America
By Melissa V.
Harris-Perry
According to the
author, this society has historically exerted
considerable pressure on black females to fit into one
of a handful of stereotypes, primarily, the Mammy, the
Matriarch or the Jezebel. The selfless
Mammy’s behavior is marked by a slavish devotion to
white folks’ domestic concerns, often at the expense of
those of her own family’s needs. By contrast, the
relatively-hedonistic Jezebel is a sexually-insatiable
temptress. And the Matriarch is generally thought of as
an emasculating figure who denigrates black men, ala the
characters Sapphire and Aunt Esther on the television
shows Amos and Andy and Sanford and Son, respectively.
Professor Perry
points out how the propagation of these harmful myths
have served the mainstream culture well. For instance,
the Mammy suggests that it is almost second nature for
black females to feel a maternal instinct towards
Caucasian babies.
As for the source
of the Jezebel, black women had no control over their
own bodies during slavery given that they were being
auctioned off and bred to maximize profits. Nonetheless,
it was in the interest of plantation owners to propagate
the lie that sisters were sluts inclined to mate
indiscriminately.
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The White Masters of the
World
From
The World and Africa, 1965
By W. E. B. Du Bois
W. E. B. Du Bois’
Arraignment and Indictment of White Civilization
(Fletcher)
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Ancient African Nations
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If you like this page consider making a donation
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Negro Digest /
Black World
Browse all issues
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1960
1965
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Enjoy!
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The Death of Emmett Till by Bob Dylan
/
The Lonesome Death of Hattie Carroll
/
Only a Pawn in Their Game
Rev. Jesse Lee Peterson Thanks America for
Slavery /
George Jackson /
Hurricane Carter
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The Journal of Negro History issues at Project Gutenberg
The
Haitian Declaration of Independence 1804
/
January 1, 1804 -- The Founding of
Haiti
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updated 15 April 2010
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