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Women We Hate
By Uche Nworah
I am not sure that Folasayo
quite realises the trouble she wants to start in
people’s homes, else she wouldn’t have
written the Gettysburg war declaration that she did
a while ago. http://www.nigeriavillagesquare.com/content/view/2653/55/
Now I can imagine hordes of Nigerian
women getting ready to hang her ‘speech’ in golden
frames as reference points during future family feuds.
Brothers, better get ready. If you need lessons in
kung-fu and kick boxing to enable you to bring down the
hung frames from their weak pedestals, just let me know.
I’m sure I can easily link you up with the nearest
expert in your area. We must be ready to claim or rather
re-claim our turf. If they want to play rough, sure we
will meet them at the turf. Let’s see who will back down
first.
The last time we experienced such
‘effrontery’ was in the days of May Ellen-Ezekiel (MEE)
when she used her MEE column in Quality and later
Classique magazine to propagate women liberation and
feminist ideals. As if on cue, Richard Mofe-Damijo (RMD),
her husband at the time wrote a counter column in his
Mister Magazine aptly titled women we hate, a
parody of sorts of his wife and her ilk whom their
professional success seemed to be getting into their
heads.
MEE’s unfortunate death carried with
it and swept aside her women revolution and the men
ruled again. We were also helped by the fact that Amma
Ogan (the editor of the Guardian on Sunday) at
the time had in pursuit of love, and also in the spirit
of time - honoured tradition followed her husband (Dele
Olojede) and migrated to America, Folake Doherty,
another MEE disciple, MEE-ist and foot soldier succumbed
to the charms of a Nobel prize and was harvested by the
Kongi (Wole Soyinka), she rightfully claimed her place
in his kitchen and there was peace in the land.
Helen Obviagele, the weather-beaten
agony aunt of the Vanguard newspaper, just
couldn’t fight the battles alone. The other women at
this time who ventured but were obviously relegated to
their places included Julia Oku (creative director and
co-founder of SO & U), The NTA big girls notably
Jennifer Madike who succumbed to Abubakar Atiku's
'charms', Ruth Benamaisa-Opia who married the fugitive
billionaire Prof. Eric Opia.
Grace Alele-Williams (ex - Vice
Chancellor of Uniben) and 'double chief' Mrs. Kuforiji
Olubi (former UBA chairman) stood miles apart, obviously
because they were from a different generation and
still cherished their womanly roles and values. They
sure didn't want those female chauvinists to stop by
their different homes on the way to their protest rally
knowing what Oga would say.
See who is complaining of oppression
and marginalization, if anything it is Nigerian men that
should indeed be considering a class action suit against
women at the United Nations Court of Human Rights, for
all the decades of ‘abuse’, manipulation and emotional
blackmail; they are the ones that have been
marginalizing us. All these who talk about oppression
don’t hold water with me.
We all know how far Nigerian men
would have all gotten in life if not for the devilish
ways that our women have tempted us and diverted our
attention away from pursuing more important matters
aided by their bottom power. How many meetings have we
cancelled, how many football games have we missed, how
many girls’ telephone numbers have we passed, how many
boys night out have we given up to please them? I don’t
even want to recount all the investments we have sunk in
their bottomless well, more than enough to complete a 5
storey building in the village.
You guys have played us enough; you
pick and choose when to fly either your weaker sex or
equality argument, when in reality you have always been
operating in the shadows, shaping and manipulating men,
and by so doing the course of history. No thanks to you,
Man almost lost his destiny through your serpentine
relationships, and you claim that we don’t consult you
when taking decisions nor listen to your counsel, the
few occasions in history when we did, see where that
left us.
Which man has not fallen under your
wicked charms and spell? Name them: Samson had Delilah
on his heels, Hitler had Eva Braun, Solomon had
Bathsheba, closer home Jennifer Madike became Fidelis
Oyakhilome’s archiles heel, what of Oga Sani Abacha? The
dark goggled one allegedly met his doom on top of a
Russian prostitute.
How sly can women be? With their
pretences and stories, oh! I need to fix my hair, oh! I
need to recharge my phone, oh! this, oh! that. How come
they don’t throw in the equality argument at such
occasions? And to think that we used to forgo our lunch
or dinner back in the university to please them, opting
rather to go for the innovative 0-1-0 feeding formula,
and see what we are getting back from them, what
nonsense. They should start getting ready to pay us back
our money if they want peace.
So you see why we are the ones that
should be attempting to free ourselves from your paws
and claws, you are indeed living up to your woman
calling, which have been variously interpreted to also
mean ‘to woo man’ or woe unto man forever’.
And should
all the dowry and stuffs we spent to marry them be
in vain, so on that day when they were jiggling their
waist to traditional music, accented by the jigida tied
around their waist and rejoicing at their new status and
change of name, why didn’t they throw in the equality
argument before the elders, let them do that and then we
shall see how the marriage expenses will be worked out,
equally then.
I am chivalrous and would gladly
champion women causes but still I am one to know as
a traditional Igbo man, (a titled one at that) that men
and women have their traditional roles. I have accepted
with gladness my own role, based on my understanding of
it, as handed down by my tradition, forefathers and
religion. I will continue to work hard to provide for my
family. The same way I expect my wife to also fulfill
her ordained roles. This argument is beyond who cooks
food for the family, that I think is trivializing it,
rather I think it is about the wider issue of attitude
and motives which both the man and woman bring into the
relationship.
Any rebellious and selfish up-front
gung-ho attitude smacking of suspicion and mistrust from
day one is obviously brewing a recipe for disaster. Any
day a woman’s salary, professional or social standing
starts getting in the way of her other commitments to
her family and at home, such that the man now suddenly
seems so little, and becomes simply Mr X, and the
honey/darling prefix/suffix flies out of the window,
that day the woman should as well call her mother in the
village and ask her to make place for her in her
husband’s (the girl’s father’s) house because she is
coming home that day.
To all the sisters feeling empowered
by Folasayo’s article, not so fast. Remember that you
are still women and not men, unless you are all
contemplating sex change operations. Sure you can buy
sperms, toy boys, sex toys and all that, but you still
need a man to ruffle those hairs that you have spent
hours and a fortune fixing at the salon, paid for by the
brother usually.
This new war of the sexes obviously
is on. The men, where are you?
Uche Nworah is freelance writer, lecturer and brand
strategist. He studied communications arts at the
University of Uyo, Nigeria and graduated with a second
class honours degree (upper division). He also holds an
M.Sc degree in marketing from the University of Nigeria,
Enugu campus and obtained his PGCE (post-graduate
certificate in education) from the University of
Greenwich where he is currently enrolled as a doctoral
candidate. His articles have been published by several
websites and leading Nigerian newspapers. He received
the ChickenBones Journalist of the Year award in 2006.
Uche can be contacted through
www.uchenworah.com and
info@uchenworah.com.
* * *
* *
Responses
Obviously, the letter is offensive. Its veiled threats
of violence against women make it more so. And it is
complicated by the fact the writer is no longer a
Nigerian living a 'traditional' life, instead he has
left Nigeria for the UK. Obviously he will have to make
adaptations to the adopted country of his choosing. If
he cannot, he will end up the worse for it. (I cannot
really comment on the content of the letter as it
relates to traditional African practices as I am not
familiar with same).
And of course someone should clean up the writing.
However, whether to post it is another question
entirely. Unpopular stuff can breed controversy, and
controversy is always good for business, and web
business depends on page views, advertising, and
donations, etc. Right? Leaving that aside, there's
always the 'sunshine' rule, whereby odious and unpopular
ideas are brought out to the light of day so they may be
discussed and aired out and disinfected, as it were.—Denton
* * *
* *
This sounds like hate
mail to me. If posted, I think it should be labeled as
such.—Daniel Minter
* * *
* *
This “article”, with hate in the title…hmmm…ok…. Before
you print, consider these points:
1. On the list of women who betrayed men, he placed:
“Hitler had Eva Braun” That is just crazy talk.
2. Second there are several other articles of more
substantive value on the blog his article had links to.
3. IF you were to print this, I might recommend
putting a counterpoint article, or more aptly, place it
in the context of other articles on African women
leaders. I would really like to see a Nigerian brave
enough to break down to us all the strange relationship
between so-called traditions, money and power in that
society as represented in that article.—Andrea
R. Roberts,
University of Pennsylvania, MGA Candidate
* * *
* *
Rudy,
I just read the piece you sent and honestly do
not think ChickenBones should provide a space for what
is clearly a domestic battle between Nigerian Women
andMen. The battle is clearly down and dirty at this
point and as a woman (specifically African American) I
find the misogynistic posture of the entire piece
offensive. The writer should be told to seek another
venue for
his diatribe.—Alice Deck,
Associate Prof.
English Dept.
U of Illinois
* * *
* *
Dear Rudy: Post it.
One thing I treasure about ChickenBones is the variety
of stances within its pages, whether I agree with the
stances or not. I especially appreciate that these
different perceptions are from, predominately, people of
color. I am always entertained and horrified at the same
time when I read black relationship articles, however.
Where in the world do these people come from,
is usually my first question. I thought that this
article was clearly written by a boy, not a mature
man.
However, I think you should post it. A grown black man—however ill-informed and bargain-basement educated
as I think this man is -- has taken the time to talk,
something black men do not do easily. We need to hear
these things, just like we needed to have read and argue
about and analyze THE COLOR PURPLE—and to see the
beauty in that novel and experience the human
development of the characters -- and we need to read
such letters and articles as these you hold in question,
from obviously irate black African men, about their
feelings on the sisterhood, black womanhood, how the
black nation will progress, domestically, from where we
are. How else are we going to know what black people
think ? At my high school I was not privy to such
discussions and opinions because I was surrounded by
white literature (Melville and
Dickinson), conservative white daily newspapers (The
StarLedger that we now call The StarLiar) and black
newspapers (NJ Afro) that published bucket-of-blood
headline stories, and did not analyze any situations.
I, for one, want to know what black
folk think. Even if you have to add a disclaimer to the
article. I direct my students to
ChickenBones and the kinds of articles that you
currently hold in question because I feel deeply the
power of self-education. Self-education is an African American
tradition that I hope to keep alive.
I read conservative periodicals such as Ebony and
Positive Community Magazine and will continue to do so.
But ChickenBones is also among my reading
material. All are equally important to me, and my
personal development.
Because I am a ChickenBones supporter, I know that my
students will read opinions in this journal that they
will not read in their conservative campus newspapers or
white daily home newspapers. Therefore, I recommend you
post the article.
The prolific Langston Hughes said that we were beautiful
and ugly too, as this article denotes. So be it. If
readers disagree to what this man says, they can send in
their petitions. But, to put a muzzle on his mouth/pen
-- especially when he is speaking of something so
critical as how black men and women relate to each other
and how they actually un-love one another -- would be
more criminal than the excruciating pain I felt as I
read his words on the page.—Sandra L. West
New Jersey
* * *
* *
Hey, Rudy, the article is absolutely
the product of male chauvinism, but it is so well
written and is funny as hell, so, sure, go ahead and
post it—along with the reference to her article. I'm
wondering, though, why he didn't post it on The African
Village in direct rebuttal to her article. I read hers
(and his) very quickly. Hers, too, is well written and
right on target; she takes to task women as well as men
who buy into that traditional nonsense. I'd like to
take her on on a couple of her statements, but what I'd
really like is to duke it out with the guy . . . except
I don't have time. Too bad.—Miriam
* * *
* *
Hi Rudolph,
Simply put, this sounds like some 'hateration' to me, as
well, but I don't think my opinion here should silence
useful or critical discussion. I guess my first
question, Rudolph, is what is your editorial mission for
ChickenBones: A Journal, and why do you post some
material vs. others? What would you hope to create in
the world by posting this side of a discussion you
admittedly know very little about? I wouldn't feel
comfortable doing so, unless I had an informed
perspective on both sides, and included both sides or
(multiple sides) of the discussion for my readers.
Providing a coherent socio-political context seems key,
otherwise, you could be stepping on a minefield and not
know why things blew out of proportion.. Have you
researched the women this writer discusses in his
article?
Just some initial thoughts—SRT
* * *
* *
If Nigeria is like many other
countries where a dowry is required, the dowry is the
only thing she will get from her husband besides the
humiliation of having a second wife brought into the
house.—Linda
* * *
* *
Did this fellow not read
Folasayo
Dele-Ogunrinde's statement that precedes her
observations? What can we say, except—"If the shoe
fits,..."? It's only those whose feet comfortably slip
into the shoe who complain.—Mackie
* * *
* *
Rudy -
First of all, I admire your journal, and hope to submit
some essays and other items. Secondly, I am a scholar
in African traditional systems, particularly ancient
Egypt & the Yoruba system Ifa, which I have practiced
for several years. Please note that I have not
read [0nly scanned] the article you posted below, though
I have read the responses. I say this for a reason,
because the more of your responses I read, the more I
realized this was not so much about what the author
wrote, but how he wrote it, and you seem to be grappling
with the principle of fairness-in-presentation as much
as fairness to women. Some people on this list have
known me on the AFAM list for years, and I have been
proud to be considered by some progressive women I have
know as a feminist/womanist—it is one of the highest
compliments I have ever received. I feel these points
are a necessary precursor to my following comments.
First of all, I agree with, Ms. Deck, in that I believe,
this is a in-country, intra-ethnic
argument, but, perhaps more telling is it is NOT an
American/Western argument. Let me be clear: the abuse
of women in Africa—from subincision/circumcision to
the twisting of laws and traditions to serve
neocolonial/patrifocal needs—is heinous and legion,
but this is true worldwide...it is only a question of
degree. The misogyny of the premise is self-evident in
the article below.
We are at a fairly unique historical juncture. In
ham-handed profit-driven arrogant blindness, the West
seems in a rush to FORCE the rest of the planet to
accept its principles, its moral systems, its sense of
justice as the ONLY righteous path, no matter the
rampant inequities in their applications on their home
soil, in dealings with their own people, their women and
poor in particular.
Like the healing of a medical patient, much must be
understood about the specific components of their
existing systems—to what extent are they out of
alignment &/or compromised—by their own standards;
to what extent do these issues arise from outside
meddling &/or virulent self-consumption. Treat a
vegetarian for some ailments as though she were a meat
eater, and you exacerbate the problem. The analogy
applies here. In many African countries, there is a
system, a network of women who promote female
circumcision as the perpetuation of a revenue & power
base -- the abuse of their own gender for greed and
twisted traditions...even if you examine the reasoning.
If your goal is an open conversation, then at least two
things are true: 1. you will need to present more than
just the obvious two sides, but provide some of the
essential back story & infrastructure which support
these practices -- an examination of the historical
precedence & shifts which led to present circumstances,
particularly the salient issues of culpability; 2.
There is no way to avoid controversy, even hurt
feelings, but there should be some basic ground rules of
simply human decency & dignity which must be upheld at
all costs, or, those who most need to be heard will be
squashed. An appropriate African proverb here: "When
elephants fight, it is the grass which suffers."
As editor, given your queries, it may behoove you to
research some of the aforementioned aspects of this
issue. Of interest, you may find female sources who
support the present system, and male sources who feel it
is vilely oppressive can provide insights from their
vantage points which are highly instructive, and seldom
heard or seen.
The West is shocked when accused of high cultural
arrogance in presuming they have the right to judge
another and tell a sovereign people what they should do
& how they should live an ethical life in their own
country. If, along with recognizing these last points,
folks can sustain a detachment -- which we find so much
easier with other cultures, like China/Japan/Korea --
they may, finally, achieve some true insight into the
internal dynamic of these other cultures. Some have
existed for thousands of years.
When you lunge to suggest certain rights are
inalienable, think of how the vegetarian Hindu nearby
feels when they see you eat a steak. Would we be
willing to accept someone else's dictate of what THEY
felt was an 'enlightened' life when it so clearly
collides with our own sense of correctness? This is not
a simple or easy thing. Oppression is wrong wherever it
occurs. Yet, how can we so vociferously protest these
issues in other nations when we cannot clean up our
own? What better message of support could there be than
effecting such change here? Look at what the Black
Power movement did around the globe. If we cannot fix
us, how can we hope to heal anyone else? It's substance
abuse counseling offered by practicing drug addicts.
Makes sense in a Bushite sort of way.
I hope this is helpful...in peace & respect—Jamal
Ali
* * *
* *
Rudy, Well,
I think the essay does reflect a "male chauvinist"
stance, and I am not sure if it would be a "good fit"
for ChickenBones. To me, the tone of the essay
is rather retro in its politics and, as other people on
the list have commented, it is offensive--at least from
my Black American male viewpoint.
One of the
things that I admire and like about ChickenBones
is its progressive and, sorry for the lack of a better
word so early in the morning, almost grassroots
sensibility. I don't think that Nworah's piece is
reflective of that.—PEACE,
Andre
* * *
* *
"If you
miss Governor Wallace, and you can't find him nowhere,
Just come on over to the crazy house, he'll be resting
over there, Hallalujah! Now, if you miss Jim Clark, and
you can't find him nowhere, Just come on over to the
graveyard, he'll be laying over there. Hallalujah!"
"IF YOU
MISS ME FROM THE BACK OF THE BUS" Sung by Betty Mae
Fikes and the Selma Youth Freedom Choir Recorded in
Selma, Alabama 1963
What is
this? I didn't even continue to read this article
because it sounds like some one's self
victimization trying to justify himself for doing so.
Just creates another wall around himself and others. At
times like these we need to focus on what we can do to
grow stronger and how to work together to benefit our
future generations, especially in Africa. Let us not
forget Rawanda. Speech like that is outdated and reminds
me of the Willy Lynch recipe for how white slaveowners
could maintain their slave population.
We have just lost a very wonderful female writer,
Octavia Butler" and I feel that the mere fact that we
are discussing this ?article? is an injustice to her
honor. Let's refocus our attention into something more
fruitful and positive.—Angelique
* * *
* *
Rahim-Peace!
I have just read Uche's article. I am appalled.
Are African women really our enemies? The BBC reported
that 10 thousand Black women were raped by militia's in
the Congo. It is reports like these that make me wonder
if Africa will ever amount to anything in the world.
Uche would have been better served to garner support for
these women than to write such a foolishly conceived
article.
But as you know, I have been critical of much that is
going on in Africa for awhile. This does not mean that I
am totally unsympathetic to the plight of the poor of
Africa. On the contrary, there suffering is made all the
more real to me when I am confronted by the statistics
of 10 thousand women raped!!! Or when, I know that
Nigeria has given refuge to a war criminal. Now there is
a subject I like to see Uche tackle.
All of this homophobia and sexism is beyond my
comprehension. While globalization is attempting to
grind the poor of the world beneath its heels, are these
issues the most pressing?—amin sharif
* * *
* *
Rudy,
the
essay by
Folasayo Dele-Ogunrinde is actually very
well-written, very intelligently and compassionately
argued. It is also fair and balanced. All of the
issues about which she is concerned are actually treated
exhaustively in Women
in Chains: Abandonment in Love Relationships in the
Fiction of Selected West African Writers (Black Academy Press, 1994)—the book is already in featured in the web page you
created of my writings in Nathanielturner.com. Rather
than lopsided, Folasayo's essay also pinpoints the areas
in which Yoruba / Nigerian women ( who could somewhat be
extended to mean African women) sell themselves short,
and become willing victims of their own oppression.
On the other hand, the rejoining
essay (and I really do not care to get into its
polemics) trivializes really serious cultural and
personal attitudes and issues that determine the
happiness or misery of many unfortunate women—educated or illiterate, urbanized or rural. His light /
frivolous style reminds me of that of the Nigerian
writer Chinweizu.
Generally, African male / female
relationships have, and will continue to
sustain in-depth exploration by all humanist writers /
theorists who want a change - indeed an obliteration—of those negative features of African culture promoted
by male attitudes, dictated by an overblown ego, and by
an unjust but entrenched sense of male entitlement. So
much harm is done in the name of culture whereas it is
actually all about what is right, human and godly.
Concerned women and empathetic men
called gynandrists—see writings by the Kenyan
Ngugi
wa Thiong'o, the Congolese
Henri Lopez, the Camerounian
Mongo Beti, Nigerian
Isidore Okpewho, and
especially Senegalese
Ousmane Sembene (moderately
Chinua Achebe, and by many other more modern and younger
socio-cultural writers)—are actually striving to
change the retrogressive aspects of the traditional
status quo, while retaining the good features that will
usher Africa into a period of progress, peace,
tolerance and prosperity. Such revisionists ideas (no
doubt to be opposed by the self-indulging male) are
grounded on an equitable treatment of the female
population encouraged in ways that will not only
empower women but contribute to the maintenance of a
stable, family structure - which is the bedrock of
African humanism.
Women in Chains . . . and
A History of Africana
Women's Literature (BAP 2004) deal
exhaustively with all these. In all the arguments,
enlightened men who are secure in their maleness because thery are successful as well as just have nothing to
fear, and everything to gain from any female educated
or not who is happy, respected and secure in her
womanhood. Man and woman - African or otherwise -
deserve to be happy in relationship to each other. Take
care.—Dr.
Rose Ure Mezu
* * *
* *
Rudy,
African culture is not what we see nowadays. The real
culture is hidden below the surface, very much as it
persisted during the history of our country. The
culture that, ironically, best represented the
continuation of African culture was that which persisted
throughout the post enslavement period of segregation
and continued oppression that went on. It made us
have to be a community. The values that my
grandparents passed on were counter to the European mode
of oppression that gave Grand Dragons, Wizards and White
Citizens Councils and other organizations the right to
think that they were "better". We had to counter the
teachings of the oppressor though we tended, too much,
to mimic him via the adoption of social and religious
attitudes that were not about benefitting us as a
people.
The
African tradition that I adhere to is one that I've
gleaned from the teachings of history and encounters
with such great teachers and John Henrik Clarke,
Charshee McIntyre, Clarence Munford, Ben Swinson and
others who demand that one peers beneath the surface.
John Mbiti, in his writings, talk about how Africans "africanized"
their religions. The key is understanding what comes
out of African tradition and what has been imposed on
the culture by the oppressor, including the history.
We also
have to understand that African history is world
history. We start with (and now and before) Dinquinesh
(Lucy) and move forward thru the many diaspora that have
taken place since the first place had more people that
it could provide for leading to migration and new
settlements.
We have to
understand the psychological positions imposed by
environmental circumstance which reacted and created the
phenotypic variety that exists around the planet.
The
patriarchial murder cults that have called themselves
religions are another governmental device (The Holy
Roman Church government, for example) that continue the
ecclestical model which has continued to "dumb down"
mankind for the benefit of those who would live well,
wear expensives robes, live as princes in palaces and
sometimes wear the latest variation on the double crown
of Kemet. All this while their subjects are allowed to
starve and barely exist in the name of some Diety that
only speaks to the few who are privileged to have
conversations with Our father whosomever.
Our
parents who survived the subjugation did so (as we do)
because of an African moral foundation that helped us
(even with religion) by provided psychical fortification
from the social abuses that occured daily. My
grandfather rode a bicycle to work for years to avoid
having to put up with paying his money to ride on a
segregated bus. It was his form of protest. When I went
to jail and some family members wanted me shipped to
California (or somewhere) for their own good, it was my
grandmother who made them understand that my effort
wasn't personal but for them.
My search
for truth began with my dissatisfaction with a clergy
that expected me to believe blindly and accept willing
that which was not good for my spiritual development,
leading me to search for answers. Ultimately, those
answers were provided by historians who looked like me.
I am of
African descent. I have Native American, French and
Irish blood but I've never been treated as anything but
African.
Therefore,
it's fine with me being an American African as long as I
can maintain my beliefs and don't have to cater to the
ignorance that stem from ahistorical perspectives. I
reconciled my spiritual views via my effort to
understand what motivated people to religion in the
first place. I had to position my own conceptions
against other just to see if they worked. I
discovered that I'm closer to the Kemetic conception
that is gnostic which is about knowledge based
spirituality as opposed to ecclesiastical or
faith-based.
The
complexity of all this is created by the fact that
European history has to deny its role in the destruction
of a number of civilisations that were about to blossom
but were cut off by bad attitudes and new diseases
brought by those people from the icy north.
The
environments that created these cultures were harsh and
unforgiving. Cheikh anta Diop makes the case very well
in his "African Origins of Civilisation" and "Civilisation
or Barbarism". He also used his knowledge of history
and science to produce a plan that would work for the
continent were it to be accepted and put into play.
This, again, produces information that the puppet
masters consider dangerous to the strings that they've
spent so much time attaching to their subjects.
We can't
understand all of what bombards us but we can glean from
that what is best and what represents us. I would
wonder what would have happened if even half the genius
that was wasted in cotton and other fields in
this hemisphere (...for whose benefit?). I think of the
genius that is being wasted now because of the broken
lines of cultural continuity that keep up adhering to
the "Willie Lynch Conception" that keeps us at one
anothers throats just for the sake of being "mo' lak
massa".
We have
been burdened with alien cultural chains. I hate
mysogynists as much as anyone who has the time to think
and question the relationship between men and women. I
have been there and outgrown that to understand that we,
in order to move forward, have to look deep into the
past and use the history and understanding of world
cultural development to eliminate the negatives and
bring forward the positives that work.
Hang in, brother.
Hotep.—Chuck
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yuck. I
don't think you want to go here. This is down, dirty,
ugly and beneath us.one love—Ekere
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This is hilarious. I think Rudy should post that
reply. Afterall, there is freedom of speech and people
have a right to differ in opinions. It is very funny,
though... and the writer is no different from any
traditional African male.—Olachi
Mezu Ndubuisi, O.D, M.D.
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Rudy, The e-mail just sent out to you contains some
corrections to the text (for posting). As you repost
Fola's essay, my response and the comments of one of
my daughters which I sent to you could be included. In the interest of fairness and freedom of speech,
Nworah's diatribe to Fola's essay deserves to be posted
side by side, accompanied and balanced with the said
commentaries. There will be no lack of comments on
either side of the argument. Take care—Dr. Rose
Ure Mezu
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Sex at the Margins
Migration, Labour Markets and the Rescue Industry
By Laura María Agustín
This book explodes several myths: that selling sex is completely different from any other kind of work, that migrants who sell sex are passive victims and that the multitude of people out to save them are without self-interest. Laura Agustín makes a passionate case against these stereotypes, arguing that the label 'trafficked' does not accurately describe migrants' lives and that the 'rescue industry' serves to disempower them. Based on extensive research amongst both migrants who sell sex and social helpers, Sex at the Margins provides a radically different analysis. Frequently, says Agustin, migrants make rational choices to travel and work in the sex industry, and although they are treated like a marginalised group they form part of the dynamic global economy. Both powerful and controversial, this book is essential reading for all those who want to understand the increasingly important relationship between sex markets, migration and the desire for social justice. "Sex at the Margins rips apart distinctions between migrants, service work and sexual labour and reveals the utter complexity of the contemporary sex industry. This book is set to be a trailblazer in the study of sexuality."—Lisa Adkins, University of London |
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Sister Citizen: Shame, Stereotypes, and Black Women in
America
By Melissa V.
Harris-Perry
According to the
author, this society has historically exerted
considerable pressure on black females to fit into one
of a handful of stereotypes, primarily, the Mammy, the
Matriarch or the Jezebel. The selfless
Mammy’s behavior is marked by a slavish devotion to
white folks’ domestic concerns, often at the expense of
those of her own family’s needs. By contrast, the
relatively-hedonistic Jezebel is a sexually-insatiable
temptress. And the Matriarch is generally thought of as
an emasculating figure who denigrates black men, ala the
characters Sapphire and Aunt Esther on the television
shows Amos and Andy and Sanford and Son, respectively.
Professor Perry
points out how the propagation of these harmful myths
have served the mainstream culture well. For instance,
the Mammy suggests that it is almost second nature for
black females to feel a maternal instinct towards
Caucasian babies.
As for the source
of the Jezebel, black women had no control over their
own bodies during slavery given that they were being
auctioned off and bred to maximize profits. Nonetheless,
it was in the interest of plantation owners to propagate
the lie that sisters were sluts inclined to mate
indiscriminately.
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Weep Not, Child
By
Ngugi wa Thiong'o
This is
a powerful, moving story that details the
effects of the infamous Mau Mau war, the
African nationalist revolt against colonial
oppression in Kenya, on the lives of
ordinary men and women, and on one family in
particular. Two brothers, Njoroge and Kamau,
stand on a rubbish heap and look into their
futures. Njoroge is excited; his family has
decided that he will attend school, while
Kamau will train to be a carpenter. Together
they will serve their country—the
teacher and the craftsman. But this is Kenya
and the times are against them. In the
forests, the Mau Mau is waging war against
the white government, and the two brothers
and their family need to decide where their
loyalties lie. For the practical Kamau the
choice is simple, but for Njoroge the
scholar, the dream of progress through
learning is a hard one to give up.—Penguin
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posted13 May 2006
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